Friday – oh Friday

Today’s 3 things: I am grateful it is Friday and am still alive – what a week; I am trying so hard to be grateful for the patience Hod is trying to teach me…I learned yesterday my final order will be at least another 2-3 weeks. He’s trying to show me how to let go and let Him and I am really, really, really trying. seriously; I am grateful for my brain. I often rely on my intellect when I should rely on my spirituality but I am still grateful for brain that God gave me!

#choosejoy #3things #gratitude #neverendingdivorce #onedayatatime

Tuesday, March 15 – The Ides of March….3things

I have been really trying to focus on my mental health and healthy thoughts these past few weeks. It has been a real challenge. Hence – no daily posts.

I went to court on Feb 3rd and 4th after trying to negotiate my divorce for 2 and a half years with a person who lives in his own reality. That’s all I’ll say about him now – you’ll have to buy the book. I did not know the judge would take so long to make the final order…we are still waiting. Sooooo long.

“Beware the Ides of March” from Julius Caesar is in my head today. For those who don’t know – it’s when he is betrayed and stabbed to death. No, I don’t expect to be stabbed today – but I have already been betrayed, so there’s that.

It’s just that waiting for weeks upon weeks for a simple email to finally show up to officially end my 30 year relationship with a man I loved who stopped speaking to me even before I ever chose to leave for reasons I will never know or understand….well, it’s torturous. I don’t wish it on anyone. I truly wish the replay button in my head would malfunction.

One day at a time, one moment at a time – that’s how we get through.

Still, in my confusion and angst today I try to find my 3 things: I am grateful for all that I have and for God’s daily blessings. He is providing me with all that I need to heal – especially faith; I am grateful for my children and grand children – family and love – it’s why we are on this earth. I am sorry my husband could not see that; I am grateful that I am beginning to see my true potential. As I mentioned yesterday – it’s amazing what you can accomplish when you don’t have someone always telling you that you can’t, making you feel less than so he can feel more than. Just amazing.

I hope you all have a wonderful day and find joy and love with and in those around you. Support the ones you love and give lots of hugs….don’t ever be the first one to let go – fill their love bucket! They will let go once it’s filled. ❤️

#choosejoy #fightforit #3things #gratitude

Monday, Monday 3 things

February 28, 2022 – I am grateful that today I felt energized after work for, probably, the first time in 2022. I have been sick or just run down all of 2022 so far. So, today was a good day – serene – and the weather was nice enough, too for a long silent walk. Ahhhh; I am grateful today for God knowing who to put in my path and exactly when to do it. Blessed are the angels; I am grateful for the excitement on the faces of former students when they see me unexpectedly out in the world. It’s fun. Thank you for this day.

#choosejoy #3things #gratitude

Tuesday – YowsA 2-22-22

Cool date. Today I am grateful for the body’s power to heal – praying for the heart and soul to follow; I am grateful for frozen meals that allow me to rest; I am grateful for phone calls from my kids and pics of the grands – both fill my heart with joy. #gratitude #choosejoy #3things

NOT SO Daily 3 things

The struggle is real, folks.

So, I have clearly struggled these past few days getting my daily gratitude out. I have thought about many things to write and about many things I am grateful for. However, my current mental state and life events have left me with back-handed, snarky gratitude that I did not think was healthy to put out into the universe….until now. Lol. tongue in cheek – I am grateful that I had the fortitude not to punch that flying monkey of a divorce attorney in the neck when she continued to suggest that I had 3 months in the summer in which I could work 40 hours a week and make a big impact on my salary. The nerve; I am grateful that I am strong, intelligent, and well spoken, particularly when others are condescending, dismissive, and manipulative. It’s how I survived the last 25 years; I am so terribly grateful that I do not have to go to bed tonight with a stoned drunkard passed out next to me, only after telling me I’m dead weight and worthless. #Iamenough. #covertnarcissistshidewell #choosejoy #gratitude #3things

I will do my best to reframe for a brighter post tomorrow and I am grateful to know that the power is within me to do so!

February 15, 2022

February 10, 2022 3 things…

“February has an r after the b!?” Man I love teaching Juniors. They never cease to amaze me. For this I am grateful; I had a meeting of the minds tonight with some amazing folks – so grateful for the experience, strength, and hope of others; I am eternally grateful that my mother taught me that no matter how terrible another human being may seem to be to just kill’em with kindness. I remembered this today. And I did just that – a great big smile, and a great big wave out the open car window. I mean it was a beautiful day. The whole thing was quite perfect, almost like a movie. He waved back and then realized it was me…then pretended he wasn’t waving but fixing his visor. Oh the drama.

It really made me happy, made me feel strong and healthy and good. Thanks Big A.

#choosejoy #3things #gratitude

Tuesday and No Tacos

February 8, 2022 – I have no idea what that title is about.🤷‍♀️ Today’s 3 things? Well, I am grateful that I had some energy after school today for the first time in weeks; I am grateful for time to myself; I am grateful that I can think and make choices for myself without criticism – oh what a feeling. #choosejoy #3things #gratitude

2-2-22 3 things

The day before it all goes down. The next 2 days I will be in a court room with my husband to cut the final threads of a 30 year trauma bond. It’s been almost a 2.5 year brutal journey. Tonight I am grateful that I spent the last 3 years learning how to turn my will over to my higher power because I truly am powerless over an alcoholic/addict. I thought I had learned that a long time ago, but I guess I forgot. Tonight I will rest well; I am grateful for the amazing people who surround me as I continue recovering from emotional and mental abuse. Tonight I will sleep well; but I am most grateful today that by dear friend, Bon Bon, did not suffer terribly through her recent bone biopsy. Tonight I will sleep well. Please pray for full remission for my dear friend. #choosejoy #gratitude #3things #moveforwardwithpurpose #justbringthetruth #iamenough

In His hands.

February 1, 2022

Today’s 3 things: I am grateful for the people in my life who remind me of my value and my strength when I forget; I am grateful that I am learning how to let go of things I cannot control; I am grateful to be so lucky to have two darling little angels that call me Mammaw. I spent the weekend with them and they definitely filled my love bucket. The giggles- oh the giggles. #choosejoy #3things #gratitude

The pitter patter ❤️