November 22, 2021 – Today’s 3 things: Nestle Tollhouse Chocolate chip cookies and now that I live by myself I actually get to eat some; I am grateful for the wonderful woman who came to clean my apartment today. I treated myself to a professional cleaning before the holidays and it was worth every penny; I am grateful for Biofreeze on my aching back after a 14 hour work day. #choosejoy #3things #gratitude
Today I am grateful for taco Tuesday’s on Sunday; I am grateful that baby bird felt better enough to go back to her dorm (or am I?) yea I miss her; I am grateful for the two day week ahead of me…and then the beach. #gratitude #3things #choosejoy
I know many details have been left out as I sit exhausted at this computer tonight. That young man, the one I helped so many years ago – helped me tonight.
I woke up this morning and made it to duty sort of on time.
As I monitored the progress of my 1st period class and that of the 3 the day before I realized that not one student had managed to turn in the day’s assignment correctly or completely. Partly due to tech glitches, but MOSTLY due to the refusal to read directions, the inability to follow directions, and the ridiculous notion that if the answer requires thought then it remains beyond their reach.
Moving on to 3rd period this morning, a student walked into my classroom, threw is Chromebook on my desk and said “You were my favorite teacher” and as he turned and made it halfway out the door he shouted “I’m dropping out!!!!” Then he slammed the door as hard as he could. I tried to cut him off in the parking lot only to run into the administrators also hot on his trail. I had to return to the students in my room (well, at the door watching every step I took). They wrangled him back inside. My principal later informed me that they talked him off the ledge and he will, in fact, be returning. Whew.
During lunch I covered a class for another teacher a watched one student cheat shamelessly on a test, while the others in the room poured their hearts and souls into the assessment. (Deep cleansing breath).
During the rest of planning I had to type up all the problems technology gave me the last two days and beg for a solution. Tomorrow we will be reading from a textbook.
During the last class of the day I had the occasion to sit a student down in front of me to tell her that she is the reason I come to school every day – A wonderful project of our librarian. She recorded it. The student cried – and told me that I’m cheesy. I loved it.
Also during that class we had to start off very harshly, as students have NOT been hitting deadlines for our yearbook publication. 100 emails and problems to address. Finally, tech support showed up – God bless her at 3pm on a Friday afternoon, still chugging away to make my technology work for my students.
By the end of that class we were dancing, celebrating small victories of the day and embracing the weekend ahead. Well, not the tech person – she continued to chug.
After school I sat in on a meeting of our student group that tries to bring coexistence to our school. Their struggles are real.
Tonight at dinner I ran into a former student. As my husband and I sat at table next him. He looked familiar at first glance, but when I saw his smile all the memories from his 9th grade year came flooding back – everything but his name. Ugh – I wish I could remember their names, especially when they weigh so heavy on my heart sometimes. Of course later when he said it – I could not believe I could have ever forgotten it. This young man had the kind of smile that made his whole face shine and you couldn’t help but smile back. A young man filled with talent, charm, and whole lot of teenage angst. That angst got him into some trouble that the charm could not get him out of, so he ended up going to another school and he was gone from our lives…like so many students that touch our hearts. When I approached him at the checkout, it took a moment but then the recognition shocked across his face. “Mrs. Bertram!!” He looked healthy and happy and shared his excitement about his future. Man, that made my day.
I know many details have been left out as I sit exhausted at this computer tonight. That young man, the one I helped so many years ago – helped me tonight. In fact, I think it is pretty safe to say that he inspired today’s post. It’s the first time I have posted in over a year, I think. I’ve been stuck. Stuck in it all. I am finding my way out. If you write you know what a big deal that is; and if you don’t write – you’ll have to trust me. When an individual can get you over a year long writer’s block – it’s a very big deal. Thank you, young man.
It was a good day.
I am about two months from leading my fifth student tour abroad. This time…10 days in Italy! For each trip I like to make my own smash book to record all of the wonderful moments of our journey.
For those of you that don’t know about the smash book – read this.
June 24, 2016
Thanks, Kelly Gallagher, for the Book Club!
Year after year I have struggled with reluctant readers in my classroom. I try and try to support outside reading and despise the read a book take a test option. I want so badly to ignite a love of reading in each and every student. I think I finally figured it out.
My students this year participated in a weekly book club (held in class). They had to prepare for each meeting by doing the following:
After the meeting they had to write a half page reflection about the discussions. I love using the Writer’s Notebook for all of these assignments.
Some groups were clearly more excited about reading than others – but they all did the reading. This was just one of four classes and they were all begging me to do the project again. They kept up with assignments, came prepared for discussions, and spoke passionately about their opinions. They annotated their reading and were ready with evidence when they had to explain themselves. Did some skip out on the work and only pretend – I am sure they did (I could probably tell you names) but I definitely had more meaningful reading than I have ever had before.
One of the hardest assignments for them was the artistic rendering – create something from nothing – inspired by the book. They could take any component of the story to find inspiration to create ANYTHING. They just did not know what to do with this kind of freedom. I said art and most of them heard pencil drawing.
But then, some of them were very original – from dressing in costume as one of the characters, to baking a fresh rhubarb pie!
We are getting ready to embark on another round of Book Club. I learned a lot from the last go ’round that I will implement. I will let you know how it goes, so check back!
And remember – smart people read!
Follow me at Fields of Poppies
During our 2016 Tour we traveled more than 20,000 miles, starting in the US and traveling to Germany, France, Spain and Portugal. An amazing 16 day trip.
June 24,2016 After the long day of the June heat of Avignon, France we journeyed to the ancient Roman Aqueduct – The Pont du Gard.
A large portion of the group joined the locals down at the river and took a little dip in the cold water of the Gardon River.
I wish we had known that to walk across the top of the structure a reservation must be made. Still – a lovely treat on a long journey across France.
Follow me at Fields of Poppies
Last Sunday I read the obituary of a man that changed my life – dead at 68 years old after over 40 years of teaching. His words and kindness supported me through my toughest times as I always remembered the way he made me feel as though I mattered, as though I had value. He taught me compassion and how to listen. More importantly, he taught me how to be, well, me.
1985 We get used to the way things are sometimes and just don’t realize that there may be a better way – especially when we are young. Children and teenagers often do not know of hope and future due to lack of life experiences – or, unfortunately, due to dreadful life experiences.
My parents loved me and had no idea what was happening to me and I was always too scared to tell them – so typical. I did not want to hurt them. I began high school much like I completed junior high and elementary school – by blindly walking through the motions – being driven by the choices made around me, about me, to me – rather than by my own choices. This is what I thought life was. I was soft spoken and painfully shy and always trying to make someone else happy. I believed I had no control, no voice. I felt worthless, lost, and invisible. I was suicidal. Enter Mr. Gale Marshall.
1987 As he taught me to value myself, I began to realize that I do have a future. I began to find my voice and test it out. As I tried to decide what I wanted to do with my life, I continued to struggle; I barely graduated high school due to attendance issues. I did not have adults in my personal life that knew how to get to college and my parents could not afford to send me, anyway. Unfortunately, the guidance counselors only spoke to those that knew what to ask. Through the years Mr. Marshall greeted me with care and concern and always took a moment to check in – always willing to listen. His genuine compassion reminded me daily that I mattered and that I could do whatever I set out to do. I graduated and decided that I wanted to be the one to find the invisible child. I wanted to be a teacher.
It took me nine years to earn my degree – that’s a post for another day. When I won District Teacher of the Year in 2015, the speech I gave to the auditorium full of teachers described the impact Gale Marshal had on my life. It was not one intervention or a specific act, but rather who he was every day that saved this little girl. He had no idea the impact he made. No idea.
Thank you, Mr. Marshall. May you rest in peace knowing that every day I try to continue your work and continue to seek out the invisible children in my classroom and lift them up with love. God bless you.
Follow me at Fields of Poppies
Dear Mom,
Your granddaughter posted a photo on social media today. It was a picture from last year of her towering over me as I stood in my cap and gown, freshly graduated with a masters degree. You wouldn’t believe how tall that little baby we brought home grew to be. She was only one when you passed, she is 24 now. Anyway – above the photo were three simple statements:
Make your own luck.
Finish what you start.
Kill them with kindness.
You see, today is mother’s day. She posted this as a tribute to me and “just a few” lessons I taught her. I was confused when I first saw them. I did not really understand my reaction. I thought it was because it did not have the “happy mother’s day” stamp on it. But then I realized what was really going on inside my head and my heart and I suddenly saw you in the photo, standing between us, embracing us. Beaming at my accomplishment – raising such a wonderful young woman. I quickly moved from the post so as not to succumb to the pain of loss on this day of celebrating motherhood.
So, then I spent the day at the pool with my other daughter, Rachel. You never got to meet her. She is funny – she has our wit (and modesty). She makes me laugh and gives the greatest hugs. She said to me…out of the blue…you never really talk about your mom. Such an innocent observation by such a bright young lady. I felt ashamed at first – like I had dropped the ball. My eyes filled with tears and my heart filled with love – embarrassed, overwhelmed, and frustrated. I mean, I think about you every day. I talk to you all the time. You are a daily presence. I felt like I was letting you down, like you had been dishonored by this statement. I felt like I was letting down my children by holding on to my memories and keeping them to myself as I still struggle with your loss after all of these years.
Then, I thought of Yaya’s post. Oh yea – Yaya is the nickname that Michael gave to Alexis when he was 2 because he could not say her name. It was adorable. You never got to meet him, either. He reminds me so much of Boo Boo, handsome, bright, and hugely tender-hearted. Anyway – as I thought of that post again I realized that they do all know you – even if they don’t know that they know you.
They know you because they know me. They know you because I teach them the very lessons that you taught me about living your life with purpose, working hard, and giving everything of yourself.
Make your own luck – you taught me to go for the things that I want in life and not to just sit around and wait for things to happen. Be proactive – not reactive. Thank you.
Finish what you start – you taught me integrity and faithfulness. Determination and commitment. You taught me to never give up. Thank you.
Kill them with kindness – wow – this one hit the hardest today. No matter how much someone hurts you, no matter how much you do not understand them – Kill them with your kindness. Someone needs to. Chances are, no one ever has. How you balanced this lesson with also teaching me not to be a doormat is really something that someone needs to put in a manual, or something. Mom, I am as kind to people as I know how to be – I promise.
I miss you. You always made me believe in God’s plan – to have faith that you were never given more than you can handle. I remember – sometimes you would look to the heavens and say “you gave me a mountain this time, Lord” when things were really hard. Well, Mom, It feels like that mountain range is now between us.
My heart is heavy on this Mother’s Day. I promise to persevere because that is who you taught me to be. I promise to love my children because that is what you taught me to do. I will continue to teach them about their grandmother. And I promise to keep the faith that we will be together again one day. This is God’s plan.
I love you. Happy Mother’s Day.
Follow me at Fields of Poppies
As I prepare for for my trip this summer with students I am continuing my tradition of keeping a smash book throughout the journey. I can’t wait to fill it!!
We are traveling with Education First Tours (EF Tours) and will be visiting Germany, France, Spain, and Portugal on a 16 day trip. I have the largest group yet, at 27 travelers. I encourage them to write about their experiences while we are traveling and I model this with my smash book. Writing down the little jokes and other things that make you laugh; exploring your feelings as you are far from home in a new culture, recording your memories for years to come…these are the things I tell my students when they ask “what should I write about?”
Thanks for reading my post! Read more at Fields of Poppies. The original SMaSH Book post is here.
fields of poppies 